Automatic E-mail replies 1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood. 2. I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you. 3. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all. 4. Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management. 5. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received. 6. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message. 7. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again. 8. I am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted. 9. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queueing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks. 10. Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message.
One Question Test for Software testing position. Here's a one-question Test to help you decide how suitable You are for any software testing position: There is a mute who wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing one's teeth, he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done. Now, if there is a blind man who wishes to buy a pair of sunglasses, how should he express himself? Think about it first before scrolling down for the answer...
Disney Password My kids love going to the Web, and they keep track of their passwords by writing them on Post-it notes. I noticed their Disney password was "MickeyMinnieGoofyPluto," and asked why it was so long. "Because," my son explained, "they say it has to have at least four characters."
To err is human; but to really mess things up requires a computer. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes. My computer isn't that nervous. It's just a bit ANSI. The attention span of a computer is as long as its electrical cord.
You vs. Your Boss... When you take a long time, you're slow. When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough. When you don't do it, you're lazy. When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy. When you make a mistake, you're an idiot. When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human. When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority. When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative. When you take a stand, you're being pig-headed. When your boss does it, he's being firm. When you overlooked a rule of ettiquette, you're being rude. When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original. When you're out of the office, you're wandering around. When your boss is out of the office, he's on business. When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick. When your boss has a day off sick, he must be very ill. When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview. When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked